The National Anthrax Association (NAA) has reacted furiously to suggestions that the ownership of the cattle-related disease should be subject to regulation.
Following recent tragic events, in which the use of anthrax has resulted in the deaths of many people, there have been calls for the ownership of the carnage-causing illness to be limited. The chief spore of the NAA however, Ben Moses, has insisted that the demands are the result of lily livered liberal types, whose nannying will see us all back in communist Russia.
“Having dangerous materials and being able to use them to defend myself is my constitutional right, ” he cried in his best Mount Sinai voice. “I’ll tell you the only way they’ll take my biological agents away from me. From my cold, dead lungs!”
Moses also rejected suggestions that, as there was no other possible use for Anthrax nowadays other than killing things, it was reasonable to have some form of government regulation. “Anthrax has many peaceful uses, such as killing cattle, consarn it.”
“People kill people, not toxic spores. With personal responsibility and strong punishment of misuse, everyone can enjoy their animal diseases free from state interference.”
Latest Comments
RSS